5.13.2011

Lately,

 



Lately, I've been pondering on becoming a mother to a little girl. I'm excited, very excited. But, sometimes I'm scared. As much fun as I look forward to having someone to paint nails with, sing princess songs with, and go shopping with, (oh please let her love shopping) I know how sensitive girls are. I know how sensitive I am. I know that girls can be an inner mystery of deep feelings and worries. My prayer is that I can teach her to be strong. Teach her to be resilient in a tough world, but help her keep the inner sensitivity that will help her to be compassionate and nurturing.

I found Tina Fey's prayer to be pretty freakin hilarious. I hope you enjoy it like I did. Happy weekend.


"First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches. May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty. When the Crystal Meth is offered, may she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half... Guide her, protect her when crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called 'Hell Drop,''Tower of Torture,' or 'The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,' and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age... Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen. Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short...  O Lord, break the Internet forever, that she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers... And when she one day turns on me and calls me a B in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Sh%^&t. I will not have it. And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back. 'My mother did this for me once,' she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. 'My mother did this for me.' And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes. Amen." - from BossyPants, by Tina Fey

P.S. Blame it on pregnancy, but I bawled during the end. Thank you mom. Thank you dad. I think I'm only beginning to understand.

13 comments:

brandilyn said...

i LOVED that prayer...especially the part about Hollister. adorable pictures and post!

Miranda said...

I cried at the end of that too. I have had so many of those realizations as a mother, and I'm sure many more will come as the years pass. I appreciate my mom more every time I go through a hard patch in parenting. It really is the hardest/most beautiful thing you will ever do.

Andrea Neudorf said...

You will LOVE being a mom to a little girl.. It is the best thing that has ever happened to me! The way she is such a momma to her dollies and all the little things that make her "girl". LOVE it! xox You and your blog are adorable!!

Carrie said...

I think her prayer is one that will go down in history as being beyond loved;) Everyone is going nuts over it.

As for having a girl...you will get it. It will come easy and hard and good and wretched and peaceful and painful and you will love every minute of it. The emotions wear.me.down, and sometimes all I hear is my mother "cursing" me that I will have a girl just like me. It terrified me. It still does a bit, honestly, but then I look at her. All almost-10-years of her and I realize that she is a part of me--the wonderful part and that she is lucky to have ME as her mother. Because no one can love her as much as I can. And that makes raising her (high emotions or not) the easiest job in the world.

Michelle said...

I loved this one too. We're expecting our little girl in just a few weeks and I am SO nervous about how different it's going to be than parenting a boy.

My mom, she's probably ecstatic at the thought of all that is to come... paybacks.

Shay said...

oh the best of both worlds!! you will adore a girl...& dressing/accessorising her!

sisters4saymoreismore said...

oh my gosh! that prayer is the greatest!!!! i am a mother of 2 girls, 5 and 8 and let me say... girls are great! so fun, a bit dramatic... but so am i! they can be sensitive... but mostly to your feelings, like if they do a naughty thing and you tell them it "hurt your feelings" they will feel so bad they will hug you and tell you how sorry they are... {not always, just most of the time} and you are right... YOU can teach them to be strong and confident, its not that hard... just tell them that they are everyday and they will always believe that.

~selina
congrats on your girl, oh the parties you will plan for her!

Lauren said...

i absolutely loved this, best of luck with your sweet little girl!

Johanna said...

oh dear lord that was awesome. :-) Thanks for posting it.

jessica.adams said...

Oh, Sar... I am so so excited to meet her. She will be a doll.

BrandiB said...

I loved this post! And I'm not pregnant but still cried at the end :-)

andrea said...

Sarah! We do need to be blogging friends more often! This is so random, but do you remember that awful car accident we were in freshman year at raintree together? I seriously had almost forgotten about it until the other day. We live in the avenues in slc... where are you living??

Arianna said...

Oh, I loved this. Tina Fey is hilarious.